Thursday, October 25, 2012

I want girls to look at mirrors and say, "Hello Gorgeous"

Because you are. Everyone is. Don't ever allow anyone to step over you and tell you otherwise because they're lying.

Smile and do what makes you happy. Remember that someone out there is experiencing the same things you are, and someone out there knows exactly how you feel.

Don't let their opinions get to you. Repeat this blog's mantra again and again until it's drilled properly in your head. Frame it if you have to.

You don't need perfect skin or a slim figure to be beautiful.

Be positive.

XOXO
Bea

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Sembreak Has Begun

I'm freeeeeeeeeeee.

Free like a butterfly!
I literally pranced around my house, running to empty rooms and screaming "I'm freeeeeeeee" before everything went down and the house lost power.

I spent the entire afternoon trying to find ways to entertain myself and not die because one can only live without technology for so long. Worst of all, my ipod touch and laptop batteries died and I had nothing but an old Nokia phone to keep me busy (not that I hate it, of course. I wouldn't trade my 3 year old phone for all the smartphones in the world). Ironic, because I have NO texting life. Zero. Zippo. Dead.

After jumping around the house (yet again) and venting out my frustration in general, I... well... tried to keep myself busy.

With the piano.

And after that, I went biking. It's been a really long time since I last rode a bike. I'd forgotten how wonderful the feeling is-- the feeling of wind drifting through your face and letting it set your hair free. And you sit on the bike, feeling like you can conquer the world and nothing can stop you if they tried. But because it's been a year (a year!) since I last rode a bike and half a year since I last got decent exercise, the biking drained me.

Next up, I decided to read Artemis Fowl. The funny thing about me and Artemis Fowl is that I've always tried to read it a day before a trip. I never get through the first part because I find it utterly boring (sue me!) and by the time I've (probably) finished the 'boring' part, I've already bought new books that will have kept me entertained and I end up forgetting about it. Yes, I'm going on a trip tomorrow. The cycle repeats.

After that, I watched my brother play minecraft, singing a Harry Potter song and freaking him out.

And the power finally, finally came back. About time, too. My brother and I yelled at the same time and I was like, "I LIVED THROUGH IT!"

And everything's been good. :)

xoxo
Bea

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

The Rare Moments of Uncertainty

I don't know. I can't understand how I ever let this happen. It's always been me. I've always been one of the arrogant people who are always right and who know what they're good at. It was supposed to be me. And now it's her. Not that I hold anything against her. I was my fault. My stupid belief that things would go well. And, if you read between the thoughts, my stupid belief that I could do anything. Hubris, if you must. In my arrogance, I fell.

I smile and pretend it's nothing- to the extent that I've even fooled myself. But who am I kidding? It was mine for the taking and it slipped past me. I'm sad and confused and mad at myself at the same time.

Stupid, stupid, stupid girl.

Not that I won't ever get over this. Of course I will. But this incident will definitely be remembered as one of the rare occasions in which I doubted myself; in which I, the perfectionist, failed.

Xoxo
Bea

Ps: This has nothing to do with romance or anything of that sort. Far from it, actually.